Angriff der Killerhasen

[lennier1]

Hab´ heute in einem meiner Lieblingsforen folgenden Text im Offtopic-Bereich gefunden (wahre Story!!!):

Me, my brother Darryll and my twin Darwin used to live in Lancaster, CA and in

Lancaster there is rarely something to do around there. so going hunting

is the typical male bonding, dirty joke telling past time in Lancaster.

So picture this...

Me Darwin, Darryll and a friend named Rodney all had riffles and went

hunting in the vacant parts of Lancaster near the boonies in the woods. And mind you...

All of us are decked out in camouflage clothes and gear. but were total

idiots because there's not really anything to hunt but squirrels, Bird's

and another ruthless animal I'm about to explain....

*Sighs* Well....

Everybody split up and went out on their mission of maim.

I never shot anything before. I was just used to the the Male bonding and telling dirty jokes part drinking beers and everyone teasing me because I can't STAND the taste of beer.

So I'm standing in the middle of the woods and all of the sudden , in the corner of my eye. I spot some bushes rustle.. I whispered

out.... *Darwin?,Darryll? is that you?* (No reply) then the bushes move

again. I stop to take a second look so I can focus on the bush and out pops

this huge ugly brown rabbit... the damn thing had red beady little eyes. I

mean... rabbits are supposed to be cute and fluffy right?? this thing was

dengy and brownish Grey color. anyways...

So me and this Big ugly rabbit are staring at each other face to face

right?

after staring at each other for maybe 6 seconds I was starting to get the

creeps. So I balked at it and told it to git, but the rabbit just looked

at me. I said GIT!,GIT!. But it wouldn't budge.. So thinking I would scare

it away I stomped my foot forward to scare it away. That ugly rodent RUSHED

ME!!!

I never seen a real Rabbit up close.. So I had no Idea that Rabbits had

CLAWS!!! after it got the first few scratches on my boot I spun around and

Moved my A$$ FLAILING MY ARMS SCREAMING LIKE A FOUR YEAR OLD GIRL!!!! So this f'n rabbit from hell is chasing me and I was in

such a Panic I couldn't focus enough to aim my stupid riffle at it. So like

an idiot I'm yelling and swinging my riffle at it then Yelling for my

twin.... "Daaaarwiiiiiin!!!!!!"

Darwin looks up and see's me running and assumes I'm running from something

huge so instead of helping me, Darwin starts to run too!!!

Darryll and Rodney see us running and guess what they did??

Yeah you guessed it..

They started running also....

So here we are FOUR GROWN BLACK MEN WITH RIFLE'S running from a brown

rabbit..

I catch up with Darwin and he asked what was chasing us..

So I told him..... GOD!!! What was I thinking??!!!!

I was so hyped that I momentarily forgot who I was talking to and after

blurting out the word Rabbit. My eyes opened wide, realizing that I'm in

for the clowning of my life , Darwin stops in his tracks and yells out ..

"Whaaaat?!!!" Are you kidding me?

*Sighs*

On the whole trip home I got to hear stuuupid jokes like "Whats up Doc?" and perdictable

jokes like... "Hey Donn... Easters coming so I think you better keep your

a$$ inside when the Easter Bunny comes"

*Sigh*

Next time I'm sticking with fishing..